“Just wait” they said.

I remember reading this article a few years ago talking about all the things that people had told this mom-to-be . I’ve never forgotten that article (I don’t remember who wrote it) but for a few months I have written my own version in my head. Collecting precious moments since I laid eyes on my daughter and trying to stamp it all into my brain so I never forget a single moment. Today, at brunch with my friend Taryn who is almost 37 weeks pregnant we talked about some of the things people have said to us during our pregnancies…


“Just wait” they said- “You’ll never sleep again. SLEEP NOW.”

they said. but what they didn’t tell me was how in the early morning hours of the night it would be just me and my sweet tiny newborn. They didn’t tell me that I would hold her tiny body against mine and that I would be in complete awe that I could nourish her and that I would learn exactly how to comfort her. They didn’t tell me that even though I might be tired that I would cherish those moments because even if it was sometimes exhausting that soon they would be gone. That each night time feeding meant that I would get to spend quiet time with God and thank the heavens above for my tiny little miracle. That getting up in the middle of the night meant that she was growing and thriving.

“Live your life now” they said- “Go TRAVEL while you can!”

I can’t tell you how many times I heard this before my girl was born. I also can’t tell you how untrue this is. How my world truly felt like it came alive once she was here. That we have traveled around the world and back, but NOTHING not a single thing we had seen or done in our travels compared to the day our baby was born. The life it breathed into us. The love she brought. It was like this tiny piece sent straight from heaven. It was like I could finally catch a glimpse of His unconditional love. That love unending. Traveling with a baby can take some planning and some effort- but kids don’t need to stop you! Traveling with tori is a riot and a blast. As she has begun interacting with the world around her the JOY in her face is exciting. Next month she will visit her 4th country at nine months old. It is possible! It might look different or travel might be a bit slower now but there is such beauty in that.

“Kiss your old life and old friendships goodbye.” 

YES, people actually said this to me. What does this even mean? I have become CLOSER with some of my friends since becoming a mom. Even my friend who doesn’t have her own kids  became such an encouragement to me. What they didn’t tell me was how quickly you realize who matters and what doesn’t anymore. You realize how much you need support and encouragement and what they didn’t say was how thankful you will become for those who pour into you as a new mama. Those who check in with you. Those who let you vent or ask questions in the middle of the night. Those who say “you are doing a GREAT job” because having a baby doesn’t mean you kiss old friendships goodbye. It means you hold tight and cherish the ones you have.

“Your marriage will never be the same.”

It’s a life adjustment for sure. My marriage isn’t the same. I wouldn’t want it to be. But what they didn’t say or describe is how your heart explodes out of your chest watching your spouse care for and love this new tiny being like never before. How you stay awake when you should be sleeping because watching your newborn with your spouse sleeping together- forever changes you. How your heart will burst at the sight of the tender care and love for the snack bringer and water filler upper during those cluster feeds at the beginning. Of course my marriage won’t be the same. It takes time to adjust to adding a human to your family…but what they didn’t tell you is that even though things might look different for awhile you’ll see your spouse in a completely new light. One of strength, one of resilience, and oh my goodness the freaking LOVE.

So, yes, you just wait. Just wait for the love like you’ve never experienced. Just wait to watch your baby discover the world. Wait until you hold your newborn for the first time. Just wait for that first smile. That first belly laugh. Just wait until your baby reaches out for you. Wait for the middle of the night feeds where you know exactly how to comfort that human. Just wait for it. There is absolutely nothing like it.