“When are you having a baby?” – A question I answer every single day.

A question I get almost daily “When are you having babies!?” and if you are guilty of asking me this question: I don’t blame you. It makes sequential sense, right? How could I forget the ever annoying chant I learned as a kid “First comes love-then comes marriage- then comes baby in the baby carriage.”

Do I want kids? YES. Absolutely. I want lots. If I had it my way we would have more then 4. I love big families and I love kids. I grew up with a mom who did in home daycare, I went to school for elementary education (with a minor in early childhood), I’ve worked in a daycare, I was a nanny throughout college, I’ve coached, been a camp counselor, and my parents had 2 precious baby girls when I was 15 and 17. To say I love kids is an understatement. I can’t tell you enough how much I LOVE them. Now, I spend my days as an English Teacher. I read articles about birth, being a mom, and pregnancy. I find it all so incredibly fascinating. When my mom was pregnant and I was in high school I read the entire “What to Expect When You are Expecting” book because I found the miracle & growth of life so astounding.

You get the picture. I love kids.

But why does everyone keep asking when we are having our own? What if I had been trying to have kids and just couldn’t? What if I just didn’t like kids? Maybe people are just curious…and before we were married I am sure I was to blame when asking others!  I talk about kids a LOT because I am with kids a LOT. Those that are close to me know that my dream is to be a mom. Not simply and plainly put, because if you have been with a child from dawn to dusk/woken up multiple times a night to care for an infant (not to mention the 1 billion other things moms do) then you know that being a mom is the hardest job that is out there.

My answer is this: I don’t know. I don’t know when I am having a baby because God likes to laugh when we make plans. Every time it seems like I have it all figured out God mixes things up. Right now Tom and I are loving it just being the two of us. I love the freedom to sleep, eat, shower, teach, and hike as we please. I love that I can love on the kiddos I teach and go home to peace & quiet. I love that we can travel all over this side of the world together- just Tom and I. I am loving the time getting to know my husband and build our marriage.For those whose journey looks different then mine- I am loving all your posts/pictures of your kiddos that flood my news feed. Your babes are precious & I scan Facebook for pictures of your little darlings as often as possible. Trust me- you can ask my husband how often I show him pictures of all your cute babies. I was chatting with my sister in law and I came to realize how thankful I am for my husband. A guy who is so fiercely devoted to me, who loves God, and who would do anything for others in need. I am thankful that I get to spend the rest of my life with this man. I am thankful for this immense gift I’ve been blessed with that I know I am so undeserving of. A gift that 5 years ago I was terrified would never come…and then it did.

So.  Right here. Right now, I am so incredibly happy. With Tom.

I don’t know when I will have a baby (and you should know it kills me to give you a quick answer) because what if it happens in 5 years, in 3, or tomorrow? What if it never happens? I know that things always work out exactly as they are supposed to and this is one of those big life things that I’m choosing to trust God’s plan for Tom & I.

but please. Those of you with the babies or soon having babies: Keep the pictures coming. Seriously, I love them. #can’tstopstaring #lovethemall

With lots of love & baby thoughts,